PENDING DIVORCE AGREEMENT

THIS IS SO INCREDIBLY WELL PUT AND I CAN HARDLY BELIEVE IT'S BY A

YOUNG PERSON, A STUDENT!!! WHATEVER HE RUNS FOR, I'LL VOTE FOR HIM.

American liberals, leftists, social progressives, socialists, Marxists

and Obama supporters, et al:

We have stuck together since the late 1950's, but the whole of this

latest election process has made me realize that I want a divorce... I

know we tolerated each other for many years for the sake of future

generations, but sadly, this relationship has run its course.

Our two ideological sides of America cannot and will not ever agree on

what is right so let's just end it on friendly terms. We can smile and

chalk it up to irreconcilable differences and go our own way.

Here is a model separation agreement:

Our two groups can equitably divide up the country by landmass each

taking a portion. That will be the difficult part, but I am sure our

two sides can come to a friendly agreement. After that, it should be

relatively easy! Our respective representatives can effortlessly

divide other assets since both sides have such distinct and disparate

tastes.

We don't like redistributive taxes so you can keep them. You are

welcome to the liberal judges and the ACLU. Since you hate guns and

war, we'll take our firearms, the cops, the NRA and the military.

You can keep Oprah, Michael Moore and Rosie O'Donnell (You are,

however, responsible for finding a bio-diesel vehicle big enough to

move all three of them).

We'll keep the capitalism, greedy corporations, pharmaceutical

companies, Wal-Mart and Wall Street. You can have your beloved

homeless, homeboys, hippies and illegal aliens. We'll keep the hot

Alaskan hockey moms, greedy CEO's and rednecks. We'll keep the Bibles

and give you NBC and Hollywood ..

You can make nice with Iran and Palestine and we'll retain the right

to invade and hammer places that threaten us.. You can have the

peaceniks and war protesters. When our allies or our way of life are

under assault, we'll help provide them security.

We'll keep our Judeo-Christian values.. You are welcome to Islam,

Scientology, Humanism and Shirley McClain. You can also have the U.N..

but we will no longer be paying the bill.

We'll keep the SUVs, pickup trucks and oversized luxury cars. You can

take every Subaru station wagon you can find.

You can give everyone healthcare if you can find any practicing

doctors. We'll continue to believe healthcare is a luxury and not a

right. We'll keep The Battle Hymn of the Republic and the National

Anthem. I'm sure you'll be happy to substitute Imagine, I'd Like to

Teach the World to Sing, Kum Ba Ya or We Are the World.

We'll practice trickle down economics and you can give trickle up

poverty your best shot. Since it often so offends you, we'll keep our

history, our name and our flag.

Would you agree to this? If so, please pass it along to other like

minded liberal and conservative patriots and if you do not agree, just

hit delete. In the spirit of friendly parting, I'll bet you Answer

which one of us will need whose help in 15 years.

Sincerely,

John J. Wall

Law Student and an American

P.S. Also, please take Ted Turner, Sean Penn, Martin Sheehan, Barbara

Streisand, & Jane Fonda with you.

P. S. S. And we won't have to press 1 for English.

Walk By Faith, Not By Sight. God Bless!

In God We Trust.

If you can read this, Thank a Teacher.

If you can read it in English, Thank a Vet.